Days Get Shorter and Depression Gets Deeper

Im sad Im lonely Im not happy with where I am right now. This blog is my journal, its not cyclingnews and I dont want to rewrite a race report with my sub-par writing skills. I want to use this space to express my emotions about this fucked up life that I'm living. Finally I feel something. I miss my family, I miss my girl. I love my sport. I want to be a doctor someday. I want to fall in love. I want to want something more than I want to be the best in my sport. No one reads my shitty writing. Sometimes I think that I only am doing this sport just because all you assholes said that I'd never amount to anything. Fuck you. Every pedal stroke brings me happiness and anger. I'm addicted. I don't owe anyone shit, no matter how gifted you think I am. This is where I am because of my choices and commitments that I've made. I wish that I wasn't poor. I love bike racing.